Posh

There's no way Victoria Beckham is with child. From my many years of medical experience & being jealous of really skinny people, I'm 99% sure a body that small can't possibly house a uterus, let alone a fetus. Can we say "Barbie Doll?" By 9 months, that super-model baby is gonna pull a "Twilight" and start breaking her bones. I'd love to know what her hip measurement is. There's a good chance Isabel could borrow her pants. The pic below is a recent shot of Posh looking hungry, angry & supposedly prego. I gained Posh's current weight over my 9 month pregnancy, she'll probably gain 5 lbs. The fact that she's still wearing leather pants blows my mind. Doesn't she just want to put on sweatpants & eat pizza?? Why can't she be like most celebs and totally blimp up? Come on Posh, take one for the team and get a fat a$s & stretch marks. I'm sure Becks will still love you even while he's fooling around with a paid escort (allegedly...please don't sue me, David). And besides, we all know you'll be back to your size .05 pants faster than I can say Jimmy Choo. A quick little post-pardem tummy-tuck & all will be right in the royal world of Beckham one more. So go on, eat a hot dog. Your fetus & I will thank you.